The Most Beautiful and most precious gift

4th day of August, 2014. I wrote This.

Today as I preparing for my new days and commitments, I starts with my morning prayer. After long time time that i did not and do not know how to pray, few days ago, i really feel that emptiness in me. I feel so down. feel like all that I did are deeds in vain. I start looking into myself. what is this feeling all about.

For sometimes once I got the emptiness feeling, I start thinking, is it because I never come forward and talk to my God? I don't know the answers. Out of my religious duty to Him, I just got up and start counting the clocking time. As the time comes, I just prepare my self to start talking with my God. With out knowing how to pray, I took a book of prayer guidance and start following it. It is an awesome feeling that i feel knowing that God know what I do not.

It all started with a sense of failure to give to my family I wanted most. Then I feel the emptiness in me. As human, all that i can do is try my best to meet world expectation, I feel so tired with my situation and not satisfied. Once i start Talking to my God, I realized everyday is a blessing. a new day being given to me to improve myself. I should praised Him and be grateful to Him for the new opportunity that He had given to me.

God is great, almighty,He is Peace keeper, and He is Everything. there are nothing hidden from His sight, i can asked millions of things that can pleased myself but He know what the best for me.May God blessed me in this new day while I push forward to achieve my worldly goal and also the Heavenly eternity goal.

It had been more than one month that my wife had undergone stem cell autologus transplant as her Lymphoma (difuse large B cell lymphoma- DLBCL). Thank God for the speedy recovery. I am glad that she is making a good progress. Her blood count had been showing good sign of recovery.

I pray and will always hope that she will be as healthy as before. No matter what it takes, I will always give my best to support her. As a cancer patient, just like most of them, she will always have a sensitive feeling. Her moods can swing all the time. It really challenging for me but I need to be strong. Sometime I do feel hurt but life need to go on. She need all the support from me. Mentally and physically, it really stressful time for me all the time but I am glad that God is always there whenever I feel down.

As for my wife, with all the hardship you had been through, do not give up. give your best all the time. You must know even if all things do not goes your way, Please believe me..I will be ready and always ready all time for you.

For all husband, If you happened to be one of the person that having the same situation like mine, please, please, please never give up. We are the pillar of our family. Others can offer words of comfort, they can give us thousands of money but still we are the most precious thing to her.